"Humans are herd animals," explained Dr. King in a media forum held last week at the Shangri-La Hotel in Makati. King had flown to the Philippines to present the results of the Pfizer Global Study of Sexual Attitudes and Behaviors, a landmark survey of over 26,000 people over 40 years of age from 28 countries including 500 men and women in the Philippines.
"This study is important," Dr, King pointed out, "because it provides us with data about an important demographic age group. Because of the advances in nutrition and medical he-alth, life expectancy has increased and there are now more older people than ever."
Zeroing in on the importance of relationships and sex, Dr. King explained, "Humans have always lived in groups and we need a social context in which to thrive. We need close connections with others to stay healthy. People with weak social ties–marital, family, friends, religious and group affiliations–have higher death rates (50 to 150 percent for females and 100 to 300 percent for males). Poor or absent relationships lead to higher mortality rates."
Fortunately for Filipinos, Dr. King noted, "You still have something very precious here–a close-knit society." By "close-knit" she meant one with intimate and solid relationships which are a source of moral support. These include marriage and with it, sexual activity.
"There are positive links between marriage and health," Dr. King revealed. "Married people have less visits to the doctor and have less sick days annually than divorced or widowed people. Married people are less likely to die from a serious illness than a widowed or a divorced person. The Caerphilly study which compared men who had sex less than once a month with men who had sex twice a week, showed that the latter had a 50 percent reduction in mortality rate and a 63 percent reduction in cardiovascular diseases." Another interesting point according to Dr. King: "Men whose wives are intelligent live longer."
How does sex play such an important role in marriage and hence, happiness?
"Sex is really a specialized form of communication," King elaborated. "Most communication about sex is usually nonverbal and that’s fine–until there’s a problem. Sexual dysfunction is a condition but it is also a symptom (i.e., of underdiagnosed diabetes, prostate cancer, cardiovascular diseases, etc.).
"What we need is continuous sexual education which is something that goes on through life. With our children, we can start by making sex an ‘ask-able’ topic. We should make them feel that they can approach us to talk about sex anytime they want to. If we don’t know the answers then we can tell them that we’ll try to find out.
"We shouldn’t portray sex as ‘dirty’ because it isn’t. How do we reconcile (for example), saying that ‘Sex is dirty’ on the one hand and saying ‘Save your virginity for marriage’ on the other hand?"
"Sex," she expounded, "is an integral part of the human experience. All of us have what is called ‘skin hunger’ or a need for skin on skin contact. It’s a need to have a warm body beside us. (It was discovered, for example, that) orphans who were picked up, fed, bathed and cuddled thrived much more than those who weren’t."
This need continues, King said, even beyond the age of 40, a fact the Pfizer study shows. She said, "The study shows that older people are still interested in intimacy and sex but are not too comfortable talking about it."
Why so? King says it’s because there is a "general negative attitude toward older people and sexuality. We tend to think of them as decrepit, dependent, depressed, disabled or demented, lonely or asexual. When we hear of older people having sex, we say, ‘That’s disgusting!’ or ‘They should be ashamed of themselves!’ (But) 73 percent of those we surveyed said sex is important to their over-all life.
"The sexuality of older people is (considered) a taboo topic because of ‘ageism’ (which has us believing that) sex is only for the young. It gives us a negative attitude toward ‘senior sexuality’."
However, King pointed out, "The need for closeness does not disappear with age. We should not restrict ourselves from doing things–including sex–(which society says) we are not supposed to just because of our age."
The study paints the 500 Filipinos surveyed as having a high degree of fulfillment where happiness and relationships are concerned, even if their perceived levels of health may be lower (over 50 percent of the Filipino men and women reported their health to be good/excellent compared with the global average of 65 percent). Perhaps, those who have been saying we Filipinos are a happy lot may have been right all along.
Just a conjecture about the results–maybe the Filipinos surveyed may have felt they may not be as physically healthy as they want to be (due to financial limitations, perhaps?), but are fulfilled and happy anyway because of their strong relationships.
"This study sends a message even to younger people," King concluded. "We shouldn’t neglect our health and we shouldn’t neglect our relationships. You cannot buy health–with it, a poor man becomes rich and without it, a rich man becomes poor."
Which probably explains how the 55-year-old President Arroyo can scuba dive, surf, play golf, and trek through Mt. Pinatubo, on top of running a country.
For the President, it seems, it’s just all part of living a "plentiful" life.