Cruise my heart
Ship cruises have always been about long journeys with short port excursions. In other words, a leisurely time at sea.
But what if you turbo-charged that getaway, with a nonstop buffet of entrainment and dining options packed into three days and nights, so it feels like you’ve experienced everything, everywhere, all at once in the span of a weekend?
Welcome to Utopia of the Seas, Royal Caribbean International’s latest ship that set sail from Port Canaveral, Florida, two weeks ago with an incredible lineup of concept restaurants, bars, stunning live shows, comedy, casinos, live music, plus top-deck waterslides, surf simulators, pickleball and tennis courts, and pools for every age group. Setting sail from Florida on a Monday, heading southeast to the Bahamas, and returning on Wednesday, you’ll never run out of attractions on Royal Caribbean‘s three-day cruise.
Our maiden voyage began with an incredible “naming party” — not just the traditional smashing of a champagne bottle, but a live DJ set from Rev Run (of Run DMC) & DJ Ruckus, and a mini-concert from Utopia’s official “Godmother,” Australian hit-maker Meghan Trainor, as Royal Caribbean International CEO Michael Bayley and his team raised a toast to their latest cruise concept.
It was just the start of the party. Utopia of the Seas has something for everyone, so we’ll start with narrowing down some of the top attractions.
• Ice skating at sea? While you’re in the warm Caribbean, Utopia of the Seas offers topnotch, high-tech stage shows using drones, laser lights, mash-up music tracks and acrobatics, such as their impressive All In signature production show (with musical numbers from the Studio 54 era to now and beyond) at the Royal Theater.
At the ship’s Aquatheater, check out the spectacular Aqua80too, with its combo of synchronized aqua dancing and tightrope acrobatics high above deck. And if you hanker for ice-capades on a cruise, there’s Youtopia Ice Spectacular, an impressive lineup of retro-themed skating numbers at Studio B.
Utopia offers entertainment options at every turn as you explore the ship: there’s live jazz from The Sunrise Sextet as you stroll through Central Park on Deck 8, with its Upper West Side vibe; there’s classic rock from live bands at Deck 9’s Music Hall, and Adult Comedy Live at Deck 5’s Royal Theater. We can’t even list all the options here. Remember in the old days when you ran out of things to do on a cruise? That will never happen on Utopia of the Seas.
• Drink a Painchiller in the company of a parrot. The Pesky Parrot, the latest onboard concept bar on the Promenade Deck, offers really innovative cocktails, whether it’s the Painchiller (a fine frozen mix of Bacardi Caribbean spiced rum, Hard Truth Toasted Coconut rum, piña colada mix and blood orange sour), or my go-to bev, Pesky’s Peanut Butter Piña (a delicious blended concoction of Skrewball Peanut Butter Whisky and piña cocktail mix).
CEO Bayley pointed out that at Royal Caribbean, “We’re constantly looking for ways to engage and delight our customers. So somebody came up with the idea of, why not have a drunken parrot?” There is indeed a real, live parrot onboard named “Brian.” We didn’t see if it was drunk or not, but it’s all part of the ship’s salty charm. “On a vacation, it doesn’t need to be serious,” Bayley points out with a grin. “Some things can just be plain stupid.” Among about 40 restaurants and bars available on Utopia, this one is a must-visit.
• Eat in a moving railway car. In addition to the complimentary eating venues onboard (as mentioned, there are up to 40, including the always-popular Starbucks), Utopia has unique specialty dining concepts like the new Royal Railway Utopia Station, which allows you to dine inside a railway car, as videos of desert plateaus, cacti and stylized Wild West settings pass by your windows. A fun concept, great for families, they also plan to offer whisky-pairing menus and other railroad concepts — like a Silk Road setting — on future voyages. Try first-class fare like Baked River Trout and Barbeque “Impossible Ribs,” or the incredible Jalapeño Cornbread.
At Izumi Hibachi and Sushi in Central Park, master chef Travis Kamiyama (who happens to frequent the Philippines, particularly cooler Baguio) serves up the best sushi at sea, and his five hibachi tables keep guests entertained with a lively slice-and-serve displays (like the one from our Filipino chef Tecson) that will make your eyes and stomach pop from the incredibly plump scallops, shrimp and beef tenderloin.
Or hop on the Vespa fronting Giovanni’s Italian Kitchen & Wine Bar, with a great Deck 11 view overlooking the ship’s aft side, with its winding Ultimate Abyss and dramatic Aquatheater at sunset.
• Thrills, spills and constant parties at sea. Plunging down a metal tube on a carpet 150 feet above sea level through 300 LED lights may not be everybody’s idea of “fun” on a Caribbean cruise, but it’s the addition of water slides, tube rides, zip lines, rock-climbing walls and every manner of adrenaline-junkie attractions that make Utopia such a unique experience at sea: hitting Royal’s target “multigenerational families” market but also catering to both younger passengers, couples, and (increasingly) solo passengers. There’s just so much to do, you can’t pigeonhole Utopia’s allure to one single demographic. Choose your own adventure, whether it’s the Spotlight Karaoke bar, the adult-friendly Solarium Bistro (with its Jacuzzis), the arcades and other kid-friendly zones, the casinos or the shopping outlets on the Promenade Deck.
And the place does like to party. Well past midnight, you can find yourself choosing between the DJ-fueled ReZolution Dance Party, or the Silent Toga Party, where passengers select headphones and dance to their own private music streams while wearing white sheets. To-GA! To-GA! To-GA…!
• Have a perfect day at CocoCay. There’s nothing like wrapping up a perfect cruise with a Perfect Day at shore. Royal Caribbean’s CocoCay is an expansive theme park of waterslides showcasing an endless array of great swimming pools and dockside cabanas for a chill sunset dip. Unique attraction Up, Up and Away offers a tethered balloon experience high above CocoCay, while zip lines crisscross the biggest wave pool in the Caribbean, and thrill-junkies can ascend Daredevil’s Tower and plunge down the tallest waterslide in North America at 135 feet. As Bayley notes, it’s a great childcare option: “I mean, just tell the kids they can go to the tallest waterslide in North America, and your life is easy.” (I made a point of hitting all these waterslides, and they are indeed addictive, including Dueling Demons, in which a ride operator counts down from three and releases a trap door beneath you, sending you hurtling through a labyrinth of pipes 75 feet aboveground into a deep-water plunge. The delighted screams still ring in my ears.)
And for those who want a getaway from the kiddies, there’s Hideaway Beach, with its massive beachfront and more adult-friendly Hideaway Bar for canoodling and getting busy in private...
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For additional information or to make reservations, visit RoyalCaribbean.com. Follow @RoyalCaribbean on IG and X, and check out #UtopiaoftheSeas.
