Is it expensive to get married in a Catholic church?

MANILA, Philippines — According to the latest Veritas Truth Survey (VTS), couples opt not to get married in a church because of the cost of church weddings.

The survey, conducted from January 5 to February 10, asked 1,200 respondents to answer this question: “What do you think is the biggest obstacle in doing a church wedding?”

While news articles about the survey used the word “extravagant,” nowhere in the questionnaire administered to survey respondents was the word “extravagant” used. The choices were either “cost,” “requirement,” “process/interview,” “attire,” “conflict of faith” and “undecided.” 

From an academic point of view, there is so much to be desired on the methodology of this survey, such as the use of SMS to collect data from respondents, the sampling of respondents from previous research, and the formulation of the question and response choices.  

Unlike professional survey firms Social Weather Station, Pulse Asia and OCTA Research, the VTS does not provide details on the conduct of its research. For example, in its Fourth Quarter 2022 Social Weather survey, the SWS provided the survey background and the socio-demographic characteristics of respondents, none of which are available in the VTS survey.

Philstar.com sent a text message to VTS head Clifford Sorita but we did not receive any response.

Because it did not provide the survey background and the socio-demographic characteristics of its respondents, we have no way of knowing how many of the respondents are from Metro Manila, Balance Luzon, Visayas and Mindanao and their socio-demographic background.

Added to this, SMS surveys were only employed during the height of the COVID-19 pandemic due to the limitations in mobility because face-to-face surveys are more reliable and delivers the most representative results.

A simple wedding will do

While we can continue to expand our discussions on the methodology of how VTS conducts its survey, we could discuss the other elephant in the room — Are church weddings really costly?

No.

Firstly, holding a wedding at a big church like the Manila Cathedral sure comes with cost. The Archdiocese of Manila who owns and operates the massive church structure sure needs to pay the electric bills used during the ceremonies. Add to that, the salaries of the personnel employed by the cathedral who also assist during the wedding.

So, is it the church’s fault, in this case, the Catholic Church, for people to shun church weddings?

Definitely not.

Nowhere in the Catechism of the Catholic Church, nor in its Code of Canon Law does it say that for a church wedding to push through the bride needs to be in bridal gown, the groom in tux or barong, the bridal entourage in matching outfits, 12 major sponsors, the church aisle bedecked with flowers, etc. 

The basic requirements to get married in the Church, according to the Code of Canon Law, are the following:

• At least one of the spouses is a baptized Catholic as evidenced by a baptismal certificate. The Catholic Church allows mixed marriages where one of the spouses is a non-Catholic. This must be discussed with the parish priest of the Catholic spouse beforehand;
• The couple must be a woman and a man who are free of any impediment (e.g. no prior valid marriages) that would prevent marriage;
• The couple must be psychologically mature and capable to consent to the marriage, knowing and understanding the nature of Catholic;
• The couple must freely express their resolve to get married and irrevocably give and accept one another in marriage;
• The wedding must be held in a Catholic church in the presence of a Catholic deacon/priest/bishop not impeded/censured by the Church and in the presence of two other witnesses.

Fr. Michel Joe B. Zerrudo, parish priest of St. Joseph the Worker Parish in Balintawak, Quezon City, said it is always the decision of the couple whether to make their wedding as extravagant as they want it to be. 

Asked if the couple tells him that they cannot pay the rate for the church wedding, Fr. Zerrudo said, “'Pag ganun lang, we simply say give what you can.”

“All they have to do is to tell the parish office that they desire a simple wedding. No parish priest may deny the sacraments to anyone on account of financial constraints,” he added.

Does he think that Catholics delay or rather would get civilly wed because of the financial contrains? 

“Many Catholics no longer appreciate the value of the sacraments. They have become too secular. Kaya little inconveniences ayaw tiyagain,” he said.  

The inconveniences he mentioned are the baptismal and confirmation certificates needed to be presented by both couples as canon law requires that both the groom and bride to have received both sacraments before they can receive the Sacrament of Matrimony.

In a pastoral setting, it is an urgent matter for Catholic clergy to better communicate to couples that getting married in a Catholic church does not cost a fortune. 

Couples need to be more practical when planning their wedding. Their lifelong commitment to one another is more important than the single day celebration of their union. 

As American author Zig Ziglar once said, “Many people spend more time in planning the wedding than the marriage."

RELATED: Couples shun sacrament over ‘extravagant’ church weddings – survey