Have you developed the happiness habit?

Happiness is a habit, cultivate it.

– Elbert Hubbard

One of the most hectic times here at home is in the morning just before we send the kids off to school.  Every minute is crucial.  A slight delay in schedule could mean disaster.  This morning is a perfect example.  While rounding up the three kids to get ready for school, Anthony informed me of his last-minute breakfast meeting.  Because that was unexpected, as he was to leave the house around noon before he takes his flight to Cebu, I had to make some adjustments.  As I made sure the kids left the house on time, I also made sure Anthony’s stuff were packed and ready.  I was not so worried about his clothes being ironed and  packed as I was confident with the support I could get from my helpers.  Unfortunately, things didn’t work out so smoothly because my cook decided to take a bath while all the commotion was going on. Anthony started to become anxious and Benjamin, my youngest, woke up sooner than expected.  I knew that if I lost my temper and allowed the situation to upset me, our beautiful morning would turn into a disaster. Well, I knew better this time because I was certain that if I maintained my happy attitude, we could all have a great day.  So, I decided to be happy. You all know, of course, that when Mama is happy, everybody is happy.

According to author Pam Golden in her book Choose the Happiness Habit, happiness can be attained, to a certain degree, by acquiring certain habits. In other words, happy people tend to have a lot of the same characteristics and they practice the same habits. For instance, happy people:

• Like themselves

• Are optimistic

• Are outgoing

• Find a reason to laugh

• Are friendly

• Spread their joy

• Are enthusiastic

• Know what their life is all about

Since practice is the key to developing any new skill, readers are asked to practice each of the "happiness habit" for 90 days.

The Parrots, who wrote the book Saving Your Marriage Before It Starts, presents different saboteurs of a happy marriage.  They are:

• Self-pity – can bleed the joy out of relationships. It is very damaging not only to ourselves but others as well.  Being sensitive to others and understanding that we punish ourselves when we sink into self-pity will help us see a better perspective of the issue we are facing. 

• Blame – can be overcome by making a choice to take personal responsibility for one’s own attitude.  Allowing blame to linger will definitely cause a marriage’s happiness quotient to be depleted.

• Resentment – is like poison that spreads in a relationship. At first, it is small and imperceptible but over time, it grows larger like cancer. We must learn to let go of our disappointment, pain and anger so we don’t fall into the trap of being resentful.

We have the choice to see a brighter, better, happier perspective.  Choose that for yourself today! Be happy!

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E-mail the author at mommytalk@businessworks.com.ph.