Bianca’s mothering style

Not all moms are the same. Every mom has her own style of raising her kids.

“I have taken a lot of cues from my mom,” said Bianca Gonzalez, host of the TV show Modern Living (produced by The STAR, aired every Saturday at 6 p.m., with replays on Sundays at 10:30 a.m. on ANC and TFC) and married to basketball player JC Intal by whom she has two daughters, Lucia Martine, three years old, and Carmen Eliana, nine months old. “JC and I would like to instill in our kids the same values that we got from our respective parents.”

As the first Sanicare brand ambassador, Bianca represents the moms of today ­— independent, hardworking and whose priority is always caring for her husband and children. Sanitary Care Products Asia, Inc. (SCPA) is a Filipino-owned Christian family-run company dedicated to providing innovative, eco-friendly, and affordable tissue paper and quality hygienic products to the Filipino market.

Describe your mothering style

“I’m surprisingly a very strict mom. I say surprisingly because as a single woman, I was very chill, open to any schedule. But suddenly when I became a mom, I unconsciously took on this disciplinarian role. I also think it might be because we have daughters, and my husband has zero power to be strict on them (hahaha!!!), so it was automatically me. I am strict but I am also extremely hands-on and malambing, loving and gentle to my kids.”

Are you raising your kids the way you were raised by your parents?

“We definitely have taken a lot of cues from our moms with regards to how I raise my daughters. We would like to instill in our kids the same values of being kind to others, hardworking, driven, giving and belief in God; the same way we were raised. JC is also like that.”

How was your experience giving birth to your second child?

“A lot of friends told me that the second child would be ‘easier’ since I know what to expect already, and I was very lucky that Carmen is a very chill, not high-need, a happy baby. It is tough balancing life and work and time with two kids but also I am lucky to have ‘ates’ around me who help us take care of our kids.”

Were things different from when you had Lucia?

“Definitely different! With my firstborn, I had no idea what having a newborn was like. I was often panicking, stressed, feeling lost. As the months passed, I learned how to ‘mother, I got my rhythm,’ so to speak. I figured out my style as a mom, and I also had established which products I trust to use on my child. When Carmen was born, I kinda ‘knew what I was doing.’ I put that in quotation marks because honestly I am still figuring things out but definitely the journey has been ‘easier’.   

“Knowing I have a support system around me that can help me take care of Carmen makes me feel kampante. Knowing I have specific things and products that we use at home and that they use on Carmen, even when I am out for work, makes me feel at ease. Knowing that when Carmen eats her meals (she has quite an appetite!) there’s the food I pre-prepared for her. Sanicare products help clean Carmen’s ‘messy’ times, even if I am not physically by her side. It’s one less worry because I know everything is covered.”

What is the most challenging part of being a mom of a newborn child?

“Everything? Hahaha!!! I would say sleep is No. 1. Because I breastfeed, that tends to take away time from a good long night’s sleep. Second would be time. Like I mentioned earlier. Running a household with two kids is so different from how I would spend my time as a single woman before wherein all my time was just for myself. I constantly try to find ways to make our lives more efficient, to ‘save time’ as they say. Scheduling all possible errands in one go so that every minute spent out of the house is maximized, is a skill.

Bianca and Carmen Eliana: Raising the kid the way she and JC were raised by their own parents

“I have been honing. Buying things online to have it delivered at home is also a huge help! I have a lot of friends who ask me, ‘Where can I buy the Sanicare Bamboo wipes?’ or ‘Where can I buy the stylized tissue boxes?’ They are always pleasantly surprised when I tell them Sanicare now has an online shop, so you can buy all your supplies on the site, and they deliver it straight to your home. So lahat na yun from kitchen to bathroom to personal to baby care items!”

Any points of agreement and disagreements as far as the kids are concerned?

“Between my husband and me? We are lucky we get along in terms of how we raise, discipline and show love to our kids.”

Kids today are updated on and with social media. How do you monitor (limit) their use of social media gadgets?

“My kids are still very young so I don’t have to deal with social media yet. But in terms of screen time, the rule at home is they can only watch TV (series, Netflix, etc.) on weekends. On weekdays, sometimes my toddler asks if she can play a game on the tablet, and I allow her for a limited time. She also prefers real play with toys or books so I’m happy about that.”

What are your worries as a mom?

“A lot! The world our kids are growing up in is vastly different from the world I grew up in. The issues are different. The environment is different. I just want to be able to keep up and be there for them and raise them to be emotionally, mentally and physically healthy, and fit to ‘keep up with the times.’ Like I mentioned earlier, knowing that you have a support system around you and knowing you have products you can trust that can help you take care of your kids with as much love and care and quality as how you care for them is a big deal. Having a partner like Sanicare in my life has helped me so much, knowing that there are quality products we have all around our home that help make our lives easier gives me one less worry.”

How do you keep a balance between mothering and your career?

“A support system! I am always so vocal about how my husband is hands-on in caring for our kids and how our ates (our angels) at home really make it possible for me to be hands-on mom but also a full-time working mother. Truly not possible without them.”

How do you know what’s best for your children?

“A lot of it is gut feel. I never understood the phrase ‘mothers know best’ until I became a mother. What works for one mom, may not work for another, and that is when the mom’s gut instinct kicks in. Whatever you feel is best for your child; that is what you go for. No to mom shaming because each mom is different and every child is different. We are all just doing our best, really!”

How many more kids do you plan to have (not practicing family planning)?

“We are very happy with two kids.”

(E-mail reactions at [email protected]. For more updates, photos and videos, visit www.philstar.com/funfare or follow me on Instagram @therealrickylo.)