Daiana: Sorry for being in love

Daiana Menezes is in the eye of the storm after she posted several disturbing photos and puzzling messages about violence against women on her Instagram and Twitter accounts. 

On June 8, she posted a photo with the caption “The End” and a photo which read “NO TO RAPE.” The following day, there was a photo of wedding rings with the caption “#NOtoDomesticViolence #NOtoRape. Till death do us part” on her Instagram account. There was also a picture of her arm bleeding from cuts and wounds. She followed it with a picture that read “Real Men Don’t Use Violence.” Diana also posted a photo saying “Stop Violence Against Women,” but with a more disconcerting caption: “Lord please I can’t take this anymore, I’m all by myself here, prayers are much appreciated. But sa totoo lang THANK YOU PO LORD I’M STILL ALIVE.”

Her posts caught the attention of netizens, the Women’s Rights Group GABRIELA, and the Department of Social Welfare and Development. They were united in encouraging Daiana to seek help and speak up about her real situation.

Due to the controversy, all eyes were fixed on her husband, Cagayan de Oro Rep. Jose Benjamin “Benjo” Benaldo. Soon, he came out in the open to clear his name and admitted they got married in Las Vegas last December 2012. In an issued statement, Rep. Benjo said, “On behalf of Daiana’s actions on social media (Twitter, Instagram), we seek understanding of everyone regarding her posts on her advocacies seeking help and support. Like any couple, Daiana and I encounter problems. We try to resolve them privately. I have apologized to her and she has accepted. We are together out of love. We fought because of love. She has forgiven me because she truly loves me. I am truly blessed.”  

I recently had an exclusive interview with the couple who shed light on the controversy regarding their marital affairs. I immediately asked Daiana if she came to the interview in her own free will and was not coerced. She answered affirmatively. 

Why are they breaking their silence? “We don’t really owe an explanation to anyone but it’s gotten to the point that even government officials are asking us about what’s happening. Yes, I am very aware about the DSWD. I’ve never ever reached out to them seeking for help. (With) GABRIELA, I answered right away but I said no, thanks. We will solve it by ourselves,” Daiana explained.

She admitted she was in a way seeking her husband’s attention when she posted her “cryptic” messages on her social media accounts. “He was so busy. Sometimes we don’t really get to see each other,” she clarified. “I want to make it clear because some people are thinking that we wanted attention from the public. No. We are just normal.” (This was election time and Rep. Benjo must have been very busy campaigning.)

So where did her cuts come from? “Sa akin mismo. It doesn’t really mean na dumating kami sa punto na violent. Nagkasakitan kami because we were stopping each other.” Rep. Benjo said, “She’s so hyper. Sometimes I have to stop her but it’s not violent or physical.” 

Daiana even showed her wound on television. I told her that when she posted lines like no to rape and no to domestic violence, logic dictated that she was being abused by her husband. 

I asked Rep. Benjo how he felt about it. “One of the reasons why I fell for her (was because) she is so passionate. She would be extremely passionate which is what I like in a woman because I’m also passionate.”

I directly asked Daiana if she was being physically abused by her husband. She  vehemently denied that she is a battered wife. She was also remorseful for posting the messages and photos. “I regret to have brought him into this!”

I told Rep. Benjo that he was seen as the bad guy. He answered, “True. Although I didn’t mind because I know the truth.” Daiana added, “Sa kanya masama ang effect. I came from a cover shoot. Panay iyak lang ako. All the people who would talk to me about Benjo, they would side with me and they would bash him and I would defend him.”

Daiana said her family in Brazil was alarmed because of the issue. “My mom came over to help out. She’s here because of the posts, because of our fight. They came over. My dad also got really scared.” Rep. Benjo’s family also arrived from Cagayan. 

Without mincing words, I told them that everything has escalated to unimaginable proportions and the controversy has become a national issue. What lesson did she learn from it? “Natutunan ko na you have to be careful of what you say because it is really up to the interpretation of whoever is seeing it,  especially because people do not know you very well.” 

Postscript: In her recent interview with ABS-CBN News’ Ginger Conejero, Daiana expressed her hurt over Rep. Benjo’s behavior during their joint interview in The Buzz. She blamed her husband for making her look stupid. Daiana said in tears, “Sana ma-realize niya na ginawa ko iyan para sa iyo. Pwede mo naman i-air out, eh. Wala namang mali na magsabi na nagkamali ako, nagkamali lang tayong dalawa, pero huwag naman dumating sa punto na ako iyong mukhang stupid, tanga o napakadaling mag-forgive.” She further lamented, “He apologized to me personally and he released a statement to the public. But when we aired our side together, in front of the public and everything, there was like no apologies at all, and that made me feel like I was the one who had the problem.” Daiana said she was going through a phase that she cannot control her emotions anymore. She was with her mother during the interview. Daiana admitted she was confused whether to file for a divorce or not because she and Rep. Benjo are planning for a church wedding. When asked why she still considers staying with her husband, she answered, “It’s just talagang love. Patawarin niyo ako kung in love ako. Sorry, blind siguro. Sorry, that’s life. It happens.”

And here is a text we got from Cong. Benaldo:

This will be my last statement.

I respect freedom of the press and freedom of speech. However, due to my apparent lack of admission and apology on TV, several media personalities have relentlessly lambasted and attacked Daiana. I feel for my wife Daiana. I believe some of them have been too personal and full of malicious intent to destroy our persons.

There is a limit to freedom of the press and of speech under our Constitution. The moment that limit is breached, we will never hesitate to file the appropriate legal actions.

We hope that our privacy be respected as we move on from this chapter in our marital life. Thank you very much.