A birthday manifesto

Without fail, whenever May turns into June, I start getting the birthday blues. That inexplicable feeling of questioning oneself about all the years that came to pass, accessing what the present has to offer and anticipating the future that begins to unfold much too quickly.

I ponder on the decisions I’ve made in my 20s and weigh on the experiences I’ve gone through: Have I done all I could to learn and move forward? As a young mother, there is pressure now to think not only for myself but for my loved ones. Have I done all I could to ensure that our happiness is a constant state of being? Do I wish to be anywhere else from where I currently find myself at present?

Somehow, as one reaches yet another birthday, philosophizing is inevitable as it helps set the mantra for a life that shouldn’t just be bearable but also filled with joy and vitality. I realized that women entering their mid-30s have so much more to offer in their professional, personal and family lives. So to those who fear growing up, getting older and entering constant new chapters in their lives, let me impart some personal manifestos that solidify why another birthday as an adult is a reason to celebrate the evolution of the person we will all become as time ticks further along.

Remember when teenage love gone astray literally stings? When tears are aplenty and a broken heart really feels like the end of the world? Most of us have gone through the physicality of what a broken heart feels like to know that as we get older, self-worth and self-respect grow by leaps and bounds. As we mature in age, we can take more pride in knowing how we expect to be treated by a partner and we seem to move on more gracefully after a romance-gone-sour.

If you’re lucky enough to be in a secure relationship or if you’re happily married, then be thankful not to be single in today’s society where it really is a jungle out there in the dating scene. With so many ways to communicate either via text, Twitter, e-mail, voxer or whatever app that catches your fancy, there is more room for misinterpretation — particularly in cyberspace. Settling down with the right one definitely has its perks compared to being young and wild and free!

The fascination with youth isn’t just an attribution to how powerful media is, insomuch as stereotypes are still perpetuated constantly in magazines, movies and television. The real reason the cosmetic and beauty industry is a multi-billion industry has a lot to do with how we are all evolutionarily programmed. Youth signifies health and fertility. It’s time to stop wondering why there are many young lasses who are on the arms of the salt and peppered so-called debonair.

Older women still feel the need to compete with these beauties. However, more and more are doing it the traditional way — sans surgery. So as much as both genders have been injecting themselves with fillers such as restilin and Botox for fear of signs of aging, there is a new trend of people living toxin-free lives and opting for natural preventative measures. Organic this and that becomes a term thrown so loosely around on food, cosmetics and even retail packaging that the health industry is competing with all the invasive surgery one can get at their local plump, suck and liquefy one-stop-shop.

Late nights at the club become less appealing than waking up early to make it to yoga class to get your “Omm” on. The older one gets, more attention is paid to maintaining and keeping up one’s beauty through healthier more natural options such as working out regularly, eating fresh produce and getting enough shut-eye. I doubt anyone in their 30s given a choice still falls asleep with make-up on, right? Parang ang dami ng regimen pag medyo may edad diba?

Mediocrity melts away as we form long and lasting friendships with people who engage us in thought and actions. No longer do we have time to stand around and make small talk with people we don’t really care for. Choosing which events to make appearances for become easier as well as we get to a point in our careers where we have proven our skills.

Hopefully, reaching the epitome of real professional success happens around this time because one becomes indispensible in their chosen fields. Perhaps this dynamism in one’s professional life comes from securing one’s place on the totem pole. Being sincerely happy for other people’s success becomes easier as we have learned to accept what we do best individually.

Certainly, there is wiggle room in the career arena as age is not a factor in success, however, more likely, with age comes peace of mind that we’ve learned to apply all our past mistakes to become a better person just like wine that gets better with age. Ika nga, habang tumatanda, tumatalas? Tama ba yun?

Aligning with non-profit advocacies such as mentoring can also enrich the soul and provide fulfillment far beyond what any shopping spree can provide. Being a light in the lives of others in the younger generation by passing down little nuggets of knowledge can truly be gratifying. With age, altruism becomes a manifesto to give back and pay it forward! And unless one has really lived a well-rounded life which obviously comes with mileage, what can one impart to inspire others seeking counsel?

Statistics have also shown that a woman in her late 20s to early 30s reaches her “sexual peak” with a zest for passionate displays of affection. The ability for women to communicate what they want, when and how they want it becomes more common as they age. Sure it’s hard to measure sex drive scientifically and there are many myths to the sexual prime of a woman. It’s really about when women reach a stage in their lives where they are comfortable enough with their sexuality that there is no need to purposely objectify themselves for all the world to see. It’s not a matter of being sexy for others but more for one’s personal satisfaction. Look at all the hot rockin’ mamas out there like Susan Sarandon, Madonna and J. Lo who continue to ooze with sex appeal as they get older! Habang tumatanda mas lumalakas ang appeal! Need I say more?

So as I turn 34 today, I celebrate the wisdom to know that I am exactly where I want to be. I am embracing my being in my mid-30s because I can fondly reminisce on my youth knowing that I have followed my heart’s every whim and desire and have learned a lot which I can share. I vow to live life with meaning. Take care of yourself first — body, mind and soul — so that age really just becomes a number, and let being young at heart become a philosophy. Life is what we make it so live it to the fullest and celebrate your birthday with a bang! Happy birthday month to all my fellow Geminis out there.