Feng shui me not

I could be gullible at times. If you convince me hard enough, I may even believe you if you tell me that Santa Claus was born in Pangasinan.

Now, don’t even start discussing feng shui with me because I’m going to be all ears and ask you unending questions. However, I’ve been making an effort to divorce myself from this belief.

The struggle began around this time last year.

It all started when we invited for our first Startalk edition for 2010 psychic Maricel Gaskell. Together with co-hosts Joey de Leon, Lolit Solis and Ricky Lo, we asked Ms. Gaskell to do a forecast on the showbiz scenario in the Year of the Tiger that is on its way out next week.

I found Maricel credible enough to ask her to do celebrity predictions for this column. She went through the list of local entertainment’s major talents and, of course, Kris Aquino’s name was included. Without meaning anything, Maricel said that Kris should get a credible feng shui expert.

A week after that column saw print, Maricel and I got a letter from the lawyer of a feng shui expert demanding an apology — or else. In the letter, the lawyer claimed that the article tarnished the reputation of the feng shui expert. I couldn’t understand why that feng shui expert reacted that way when we didn’t even put any name there — no initials or clue of any kind. In fact, we didn’t even know Kris had a resident feng shui expert — and that we were offending somebody. Sorry, if that was the case. 

But the letter was full of threats and insisted that “it is general knowledge that — name of the person — is the feng shui expert of Kris Aquino.” Huh? Is that a question they ask in the civil service exams? Do they ask in the UPCAT who the feng shui expert of Kris Aquino is? Senior law students take note: You may be confronted with this question when you hurdle the bar exams.

Even if we found the scenario ridiculous and totally absurd, Maricel and I still consulted several lawyers who all advised us to merely ignore the letter.

I also asked around if Kris truly had a resident feng shui expert. It turned out that she had several feng shui experts giving her advice — not just one.

Was Kris being unfaithful? Certainly not to ex-husband James Yap! Maybe to the self-proclaimed Kris Aquino feng shui expert. But there was nothing legally or morally wrong with that. If Kris chooses to be surrounded by a battalion of feng shui experts, then that’s her choice. As I would later find out, even a good friend whose name I am withholding (he is a very private person) did feng shui work for Kris in the past.

Although I was very sure from the beginning that there was no solid case against us, I was still annoyed — and disappointed. I was disappointed because I expected much more from the feng shui expert, who — if she had her way — must have wanted me to fry in the chair.

That was a pity because some three, four years back, she sent me a pig figurine that is now stashed away as clutter in one of my cabinets. But what warmed my heart was her note: She said that we had met before at a party in my building. Although I wanted to thank her for the gesture, she didn’t indicate in her note her contact number.

Then in 2009 I tried to hook up with her many times after I purchased a piece of lot that was triangular in shape. That is supposed to be bad feng shui and I wanted to ask her if there are remedies to it.

I tried to contact the feng shui expert through her establishments, except that the phone in her office constantly just kept ringing. I was later told that she was always out of the country.

Then came the letter. Obviously, we can never be friends anymore and I feel sad. And greatly disappointed. Aren’t feng shui experts supposed to put things in order? Why this?

After I got so disillusioned with the feng shui expert, I asked Nena Benigno’s Christian fellowship group to pray over me to rid me of my feng shui beliefs. Nena told me to be careful because it was easy to backslide. I did — although heaven knows I’ve been trying to stick to basic Christian rules. But I am Filipino and a Catholic. Are you still surprised I am superstitious?

I’ve also kept my friendship with Maricel and Jeffrey Ventura, another feng shui expert I met during the blessing of the Belo Greenhills branch last year. They are very wonderful people.

Starting this Saturday, in fact, I will run a two-part series on Maricel Gaskell’s showbiz predictions this coming Year of the Rabbit. I know that readers would be interested to know the fortune that awaits local stars this year.

As for my fate, I hesitate to have it told because I easily get upset and affected by what psychics tell me. Like what I said — I believe everything I’m told. My feng shui beliefs I cannot totally banish because some have scientific basis. However, I am trying very hard to shake it off my system, but have yet to totally succeed.

In fact, as we usher in the Chinese New Year, I’m still very confused. Should I take feng shui practices with a grain of salt or do I take it with a slice of tikoy?

Can you make mine ube flavor, please?