'A Taste of V.J.'

Heritage Forum was the venue where Eat, Bulaga! had a show last Sept. 18. It’s located at the corner of Broadway and 42^nd. But wait, there’s ngek! We were not at the Times Square area of the great New York City. As a matter of fact, we were more than 2,400 miles away! Ngek talaga! We were not in that famous Big Apple. What they have over there is just the tiny and poisonous apple of Snow White. Yes kids, Eat, Bulaga! was in the hood of “the happiest place on earth”    Disneyland! We were in Anaheim. And according to Jose, “and not so very far,” is Knott’s Berry Farm!

Our only New York connection was my youngest son Jio who took a short break from his NYU studies and flew in to join us and watch the show. Sabi ko nga, “ walang’ya ka rin anak ha, manonood ka lang ng Eat, Bulaga!, lumipad ka pa from New York!”

“Okay lang Daddy,” he shot back, “ikaw naman magbabayad eh!”

Ngek!

The musical com-cert started at around 7:45 p.m. with Jimmy’s announcement of, “Picture-taking is strictly prohibited!” It was greeted by gasps of displeasure and disappointment. Then he immediately followed it up with, “That is  if you don’t have a camera!” The crowd roared and rejoiced wildly. 

Heritage Forum is Anaheim’s most innovative theatre  in  the  round, accommodating up to 2,450 in seating. In our opening spiels, Vic compared it to a “sosyal na sabungan!” Ngek!

And at that same point, we explained to the audience the “sudden disappearance” of Tito Sotto and Michael V. in that show’s program. That time, the senator’s daughter Apple and her son Romino were both in the hospital because of the dreaded dengue fever. I even told them a short story that the show almost did not happen at all because Tito couldn’t make it. We could not imagine appearing as an incomplete TVJ. Not until a gay representative of the producers approached Vic and this writer and asked with desperation, “Pero kayo ba, kaya n’yo bang mag-VJ?” Without thinking, we answered back, “Oo naman, nagbi-VJ kami! Magkano?”

The gay agent’s eyes lit up and the rest is hysterical history. Tuwang-tuwa ang bakla. Ang hindi n’ya alam, uma-acting lang kami. At hindi n’ya rin alam na nag-VJ na kami ni Vic twice before   one in Rome and another one in Milan almost 15 years ago. The shows were then called Bulagaan sa Italia. Tito was also absent in that Roman senate session, not because of mosquitoes, but because of ticks  politicks ! Ngek!

I closed that story with, “ Hanggang may TV, may TVJ ... at hanggang may TVJ, may VJ!” They all applauded and cheered crying... from laughter. I don’t know why. Seryoso naman kami. 

On Bitoy’s side, it was heroine-related  not drugs, but Dracs (Dracula). Alam n’yo naman si Blood, este Vlad, mapupula ang mga mata. Ayun na nga, na-heroine na of the Katipunan revolution  na Tandang Sore Eyes! Ngek!

Over there, they call it “pink eyes.” And when Vic asked the audience if they have dengue and sore eyes there, they all chorused the negative. To which Bossing teasingly reacted with, “Beeeh, kami meron!”

After the raunchy, but definitely entertaining routine of Jose & Wally, and because we are trained to kill ‘em dead, we segued to Vic & Joey’s Wreck concert  a line up of very, very Tough Hits. Eto ‘yung mga hindi n’yo pwedeng mapanood sa TV at hindi n’yo mabibili sa kahit saang record bars. In short, we are all members of a BOY BANNED.

The VJ act had the special appearance of Jimmy Santos where he informed everybody of the latest name and term for gays. And according to him, the latest “gay” brand is as new as the hostage-taking incident at the Quirino Grandstand. Aba, bago nga. Everybody was waiting. Then suddenly, he dropped the bomb. The new term for a “gay” is SAUSAGE-TAKER! Ngek!

When asked how to deal with a sausage-taker, Jimmy said that it’s pretty much like that of the hostage-taker  “There is also negotiation. If both parties agree as to the amount, then.... the RELEASE will come!” 

Allan K. gave the coup de grace. In the end, they all “died” happily ever after. 

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Speaking of VJ, we are inviting all our Ka-Puregold to visit all Puregold and Puregold Jr. stores from Sept. 30 to Oct. 3 for their 12th anniversary discount days promo. Bigger discounts, more buy 1 take 1 items, more promos and freebies galore.

Wow, Meganon? Talagang may ganyan every day from Monday to Friday, 9 to 9:30 p.m. on TV5.