Let Dyesebel, Darna rest in peace

First, the ho-hum news: Yet another re-doing of the over-exploited bathing beauty Dyesebel is being planned by Viva Films, intended for the Metro Manila Filmfest (which is slated to be expanded nationwide) in December.

Now, the ha-ha news: Rica Peralejo is being eyed to play the title role which has been played and replayed by half a dozen other actresses in the past 50 years, including Edna Luna (the "original Dyesebel" in a Premiere movie directed by the late great Gerry de Leon), Eva Montes (in the first remake, also by Premiere), Vilma Santos (by Sampaguita Pictures, directed by Maning Borlaza), Alma Moreno (also by Sampaguita, again by Borlaza), Alice Dixson (by Regal Films, directed by Mel Chionglo) and Charlene Gonzales (by Viva Films, directed by Borlaza).

The ho-hum news about the impending resurrection of the half-fish/half-human screen wonder (I wonder, was the name derived from the 1938 Bette Davis starrer Jezebel?) comes in the wake of another ho-hum news about, brace yourselves, yet another re-doing of another over-exploited creature, the flying lady Darna, originated by the classic Rosa del Rosario in a movie produced by no less than Fernando Poe, Sr. and played and replayed through the decades by Eva Montes, Vilma Santos, Nanette Medved, Anjanette Abayari and, would you believe, Dolphy (in a spoof called Darna Kuno). It’s still being debated upon in the Court of Public Opinion who between them will give justice to Darna circa The New Millennium – Jolina Magdangal or Judy Ann Santos?

The purpose for latter-day Dyesebels and Darnas was to justify the going-a-bit-sexy of wholesome actresses who would otherwise not reveal an ounce of private flesh but only in a "teasing/peeping" manner – you know, a teeny-weeny glimpse of their upper natural resources with the two precious mounds carefully covered with a long wig (in Dyesebel’s case) and body stockings underneath a Wonder Woman outfit (in Darna’s case) covered with a meter-long piece of cloth tied around the waist, flowing gently over the lower front part.

With Rica having shown much, much more in her previous bold outings (Balahibong Pusa, Sa Huling Paghihintay, etc.), what more would she show as Dyesebel? Unless they could come up with heart-stopping special effects and ground-breaking underwater camera tricks (showing Dyesebel minus her rubber tail in her water bed?), another remake of Dyesebel might not create the expected splash. As Rica herself joked, "Why not a new Dyesebel? This time, isda ang itaas, tao ang ibaba." Good idea, ‘no! Why not?

If and when, that would be the Dyesebel of all Dyesebels. Otherwise, maybe we’d be better off letting Dyesebel and Darna rest in peace with their creator, the late great komiks master Mars Ravelo.

Better still, as suggested by a Funfare reader (identity withheld upon request), "Put Dyesebel and Darna together in one movie and let them clash underwater and in mid-air as they fight over another oft-revived legendary movie character, Pedro Penduko."

Yeah, why not? That would be the reunion movie of the century!

Lesson in grammar

Let’s lend an ear to another lesson in grammar from Funfare’s "resident grammarian," Ramon Alfonso A. Fuentes, "A Concerned Senior Citizen" who heads his own Fuentes Media Operations (publisher of The Filipino Economist). Here’s the lesson for today:

Greetings, Comrade:

Almost all show business ladies who were previously attached and now unattached, when interviewed on TV inevitably proclaim that they are CELIBATE. However, the context and sense insinuated by their declaration is that they have since abstained from sexual intercourse.

Per chance, it is time to make them aware that, if the sense that they wish to convey is that they have refrained from engaging in sexual intercourse after they lost, or had detached themselves from, their partners, the appropriate term to use is CHASTE. In other words, they have been CHASTE - NOT CELIBATE.

The real meaning of CELIBATE is "state of SINGLENESS" or "being UNMARRIED". Its etymon is the 1847 LATIN "CAELIB" or "CAELEBS", meaning "UNMARRIED".

On the other hand, CHASTE, the 13th century LATIN etymon of which is "CASTUS", meaning "PURE", means "INNOCENT OF UNLAWFUL SEXUAL INTERCOURSE".

From the foregoing, it is clear that one can be CELIBATE (UNMARRIED) and yet be sexually uninhibited - meaning UNCHASTE.

So, you may advise these show business ladies that, if they are SINGLE and have refrained (abstained) from sexual adventurism, they may claim to be CHASTE – not CELIBATE – because CELIBACY does not mean NOT being sexually active.

As always, it’s your call.

MABUHAY ang FILIPINO - LAHING DAKILA!

Express reunion today

"Alumni" of the Philippine Daily Express are urged to register their intention to attend the 30th Anniversary grand reunion of their "alma mater" by calling Teddy C. Berbano at 5278421 or Luz Eusebio at 4451840.

The reunion, scheduled today at the National Press Club, promises to be a nostalgic affair. Already several alumni based in the US have confirmed their attendance.

The Organizing Committee, chaired by Berbano of the PJI, solicited the help of Express friends through the years to ensure an exciting, fun-filled reunion.

Members of the organizing committee are PJI’s Radito Torres; STAR’s Millet Mananquil, Ching Alano and Ricky Lo; Manila Times’ Boy Togonon; Evelyn C. Diao; Luz Eusebio; and Alice H. Reyes.

The various subcommittees and their members are as follows: Publicity & Souvenir Program – Teddy Berbano, Alice H. Reyes, Bulletin’s Fred Gabot, Today’s Dionisio Pelayo, Inquirer’s Jun Engracia, Manila Standard’s Roberto Cuevas, STAR’s Ching Alano, Malaya’s Joy de los Reyes, Balita’s and Tempo’s Rudy Navarro; Raffle Committee – STAR’s Millet Mananquil, Ching Alano and Ricky Lo; Invitation Committee – Manila Times’ Boy Togonon, Luz Eusebio, and PJI’s Radito Torres.

Lunch is free for former DE employees. During the lunch, assorted prizes will be raffled off. These include an 8310 and a 3310 cell phone from Globe Telecom, accommodation for two at Tagaytay Picnic Grove from Philippine Tourism Administration, a washing machine from Intel, a microwave from La Union Mayor Mary Jane Ortega, two electric fans from Bobby de la Cruz, housewares from Millet Mananquil, five watches from Nonie Azarcon, a sandwich maker from Dr. Jeepy Perez, Linea Italia, Outback and Top Shop GCs from Raquel Hizon, Luk Yuen GCs from Mario Tan. Other donors are Winnie Velasquez, Lydia Santos, Ella Buenaventura, Remy Bicomong, Resty Perez, Perry Solis, Celia Defensor, and Boots Ayllon.