Love — and marriage — can’t wait

It happened so fast – all in two weeks time – that they themselves were amazed by the lightning-speed turn of events. But they don’t have a single doubt that their marriage will work and they’ll work hard that it will.

Before they fell in love and decided to get married – yes, all in two weeks – Raymond Bagatsing and Lara Fabregas first met one year ago but nothing special happened after that first meeting. A year later when they did fall in love, Raymond and Lara admitted that they were "two people crazily in love" that they could hardly wait. They had to get married ASAP.

And it’s not for any wrong reason, like pregnancy on Lara’s part.

In fact, it’s for the only right reason to get married: love.

The newlyweds (in civil rites at the Las Pinas municipal hall last July 5) discovered they have so much to share each other they want to live the rest of their lives together, forever.

To those who raise quizzical eyebrows and wonder how long the marriage will last, the couple has this to say: "Yes, we’re scared. But there is no assurance that we’ll stay together even if we get married next year."

Raymond adds: "If – and I hope not – fate separates us (a shocked Lara shakes her head),. we will be stronger as a couple."

The optimism is seen in the way the lovebirds stare in each other’s eyes and lock lips not once, but four times, in front of a suddenly giddy movie press.

Raymond and Lara have yet to fight and. as Lara says, "Let the excitement begin" in their one-year relationship.

There are no differences, as far as the couple is concerned. Whatever they are become quickly forgotten the minute they feel each other’s presence.

"When she’s hyper, I’m quiet, and vice-versa," Raymond reveals. Translation: nothing in this world can mar their rose-colored view of each other.

It all started a year ago, when a mutual friend invited Raymond to Lara’s birthday at the Republic of Malate. The friend urged Raymond: "You have to meet her. She’s intelligent and pretty."

But the sparks didn’t fly that soon. Raymond had a girlfriend, and by his own admission, had no right to look at other women – no matter how smart and attractive they appear to be.

But shortly after, Raymond composed a poem – a reflection about finding one’s path, and finding love in the process. Raymond sent it to a friend, and it somehow got into Lara’s hands.

Meanwhile, Raymond asked Lara’s number from a friend who had a crush on her (but whom she ignored).

That day, the future husband and wife talked. And the dam broke. They discovered how so attuned they were to each other. How they were so alike in many ways: independent, free-spirited, unconventional.

Their first "official date" was last June 6, a day after Lara’s birthday, when they watched a French ballet at the CCP (Cultural Center of the Philippines).

Since then, they have become inseparable. They would spend hours talking about anything under the sun. They would exchange books – a passion they want to nourish well into marriage.

Lara discovered how spiritual and focused her future husband was.

"Unlike so many people our age, he was not scattered. He had focus, he had confidence. He wasn’t just floating."

So enamored did she get of Raymond’s virtues that she actually forgot that the day after their first official date happened to be her birthday!

The feeling was mutual. Raymond found Lara’s sweetness, intelligence and love for the arts so irresistible he vowed never ever to let her go.

Like most cosmopolites reared in ways modern and contemporary (both lived abroad for some time), the courtship period was practically nonexistent. Raymond and Lara just knew they were meant for each other.

Way past the teenage years when love could be mistaken for infatuation, the two even tested the intensity of each other’s feelings.

They decided to take a break from each other.

Raymond went to Davao and the couple didn’t communicate for weeks. Absence made their hearts grow even fonder.

When they met again – last June 24 – Raymond went to Lara’s house where they talked from 11 p.m. to 2 a.m. He found himself holding her face and looking into her eyes.

Then came the proposal. Lara didn’t even bat an eyelash before saying, "Yes, yes, yes!"

And so the plans were laid. The couple told their shocked parents about it and squeezed in wedding preparations in-between theater work (for the French stage play The Lark, among others).

The church wedding will be on July 28 at Sonia’s Garden in scenic Tagaytay. It will be an Ananda Marga kind of ceremony where Lara will wear a gold and fuchsia sarong with veil. Raymond, on other hand, will wear a kurta.

They will exchange vows in front of a monk. Instead of the traditional wedding ring, the couple will exchange bindis on their foreheads and a garland.

There will be two wedding receptions: at the venue itself in the afternoon (in deference to the nonalcohol-drinking monks) and at Hossein’s Persian-Indian restaurant in Makati in the evening.

After the wedding,. the couple will only have four days to themselves. Their work (Lara and Raymond have just put up a special events prdouction company called ACT, or Artistry and Creativity in Totality) will hardly give them time for a honeymoon (althought they might just say yes to an offer to go to Amanpulo or Camiguin).

Far from the traditional Filipino macho who will make his wife homebound while he earns the money for the family, Raymond will allow Lara to pursue her dreams. One of them is to go to New York next year.

Thus, babies have to wait, until Lara says, "The time is right."

After all, Lara already has an instant family in Raymond’s sons, aged 11 and 4, who have accepted the change in their lives so easily all they want is to become ring bearers in their father’s coming wedding.

"This is why I’m in no hurry to have children. His (Raymond’s) kids are a part of him. I have to embrace that. If I don’t, I won’t accept the whole of him," says Lara.

They’ll never run out of terms of endearment. Raymond and Lara call each other "Baby," "Sweetie," "Darling," "Honey."

Sometimes, they call each other by their spiritual, or Hindu names.

Lara’s is Laghema, which means omniscient; Raymond’s is Remkant, or god of fortune.

As the wife of an avid Ananda Marga believer (Raymond admits it must be the Indian blood in him), Lara is slowly getting initiated into the ways of said movement. She has classes every month, and has learned many forms of meditation that she and Raymond practise before breakfast, before going to the presscon, whenever.

This form of prayer, she believes, is what will keep their new family together. And, judging by the glow in her eyes, and the look of complete adoration in his, this is one family that could stay solid for a long, long time.