An American Pie for Madonna
Thanks to Madonna's new version made for the soundtrack of the motion picture The Next Best Thing, public interest in the song American Pie is once more at an all time high. This is manifested by the strong curiosity over the Material Girl's electronica rendition by all sorts of people, who wonder if it is any good and also on the classic original, which was recorded by singer-composer Don McLean in 1971. And not to forget, in some cases also on Weird Al Yankovie's take titled The Saga Begins, which tells the complete story of the George Lucas film Episode I; The Phantom Menace.
Well, you can now add one more American Pie song to the list. A friend from Texas in the US of A sent me a copy of the Fort Worth Star-Telegram which has an artcile by Robert Philpot titled Reheated American Pie. Philpot's article is about Madonna's cover and how radio stations are reacting to it. Then to show how he feels about her rendition, he included his own set of lyrics for McLean's famous melody, which he titled Song to Madonna. This one has not yet been recorded but if you pay more attention to the music and read it two or three times you will soon be able sing the song.
Song to Madonna
(Music: Don McLean-Lyrics: Robert Philpot)
A long long time ago
I can still remember when Madonna was the Material Girl
And I knew if I had MTV
That I could turn it on and see
A boat in Venice with Madonna all-awhirl
And Like a Virgin made me quiver
With all the sales that it delivered
She called herself a Boy Toy
We rolled our eyes and said, 'oh boy.'
I can't remember if she lied
About her hair's peroxide
But no matter what she tried
She couldn't be denied
(chorus)
But why, why this American Pie
Wasn't broken, I'm not jokin'
And I don't like her retry.
What's she got against that good ol'Don McLean guy?
It could make a baby boomer cry
It could make a baby boomer cy
Do you remember Borderline
It was a fun song, it was just fine
And she danced weird in the video
Oh, do you remember Holiday
And the crazy way she would sway
Then suddenly she's acting like Monroe
Well, I know that you heard Lucky Star
'cause I saw you singing in your car
And then you dyed your hair
Wore bangles that gave me a scare
I was only trying to resist the hype
When I said her early stuff was tripe
But no matter how much I sniped
She couldn't be denied
(chorus)
Oh and there she was in Dick Tracy
Her bad acting drove me crazy
But she was dating ol'Warren
So come on Jack be nimble, Jack be quick
Jack Nicholson on a candlestick
Madonna just didn't fit in
But she recovered with Truth or Dare
Beatty and Costner looked real dumb there
She did things to Perrier
That in a family paper we can't say
And then she put out a bok called Sex
That made the media nervous wrecks
We all wondered what was next
But she couldn't be denied
(chorus)
I had an old copy of True Blue
I sold it in 1992
I guess I could've given it away
I took it to a used-record store
Where I'd never taken anything before
It was vinyl and its music wouldn't play
Body of Evidence gave me bad dreams
But with Ray of Light she was redeemed
Forgot she dated Rodman
Said bad words on Letterman
And the thing that I admire the most
Is that she keeps little Lourdes close
Even though the daddy is now toast
She just can't be denied
But I'm still asking
Why, why this American Pie
Why a remake for Pete's sake
When the first one's so spry
But it's got the blessing of that Don McLean guy
Even though I suspect it's a lie
He gets royalties that help him get by
Why, why this American Pie
Tons of lover, now a cover
That she wants you to buy
That good ol'song could make a boomer cry
But Madonna's version won't be denied.
Anybody thinking of a Pilipino version out there?
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