MannersMatters

While it has been ingrained in us that it is always better to give than to receive, subsequently, some of us have not learned how to receive a compliment graciously. The consequence of not receiving well is that we deprive others the pleasure of feeling valued and deny them of the joy of giving.

A number of theories as to why some people have a hard time accepting compliments range from wanting to appear modest, not feeling the compliment is well deserved, and doubting the sincerity of the person giving the compliment.

Receiving a compliment with grace and feeling good about it is easy if you remember these simple guidelines:

.           Acknowledge and accept a compliment and praise graciously.

.           Listen to what he or she is saying.

.           A simple "Thank you" will suffice.

.           Avoid replying to all compliments with another. If you keep on tossing back nice comments, some people may question your sincerity.

.           A sincere compliment is a gift. Do not worry about motives, if any, just accept it.

.           Honor the person who gives you a gift. Do not dismiss a gift with the proverbial "You  shouldn't have bothered."

.           Keep eye contact. Do not frown, mumble or look at the floor.

.           Do not ignore the compliment by changing the topic.

.           Do not disagree with the compliment.

For example, "Thank you but I do not like the style of my dress at all."

.           People give compliments for a variety of reasons. Do not waste time wondering why someone gave you a compliment. Just appreciate the fact that someone took the time to say something nice to you.

.           Smile when receiving a compliment. It is intended to make you feel good.

.           Value compliments when you get them. Not everyone gets compliments.

.           Do not return the compliment, unless you really mean it.

.           Always remember you are just as entitled to receive a compliment as everyone else.

Some insights on the art of receiving:

.           If you are complimented with a toast, acknowledge it with a nod and smile but do not drink. Allow everyone to have a sip and then offer a return toast where you can, then drink.

.           When you receive a plaque of appreciation or a trophy, accept it with your left hand, so that you keep your right hand free for a proper handshake.

Some examples of classic and simple replies on receiving a compliment:

.           Thank you; I appreciate that.

.           Thank you; you are a kind person.

.           Thank you; that really makes me feel good.

.           Thank you; that is a lovely thing to say.

.           Thank you; that means a lot to me.

.           Thank you for noticing. I worked hard on that presentation.

Lastly, acknowledging a compliment paid is a simple yet very effective way to make a positive impression and build a favorable reputation. It is not only good manners, but a sign of someone who is confident and self-assured.