A Woman and Wife in God's Eyes

CEBU, Philippines - My mother is a homemaker, a "housewife", like most moms. As simple as that sounds, her profession is way more complicated. She has achieved much to become the very description of a woman and a wife in God's eyes. 

Mama Rose owns her little shop, Mikki's Enterprises, and supplies chocolate imported from the US to the Philippines, while the rest of the family members goes in and out of the home every day. While everyone else is preoccupied with his own life, she makes the house warm enough to come home to.

While other mothers do "general cleaning" weekly or monthly, Mama does this every other day. She makes sure that the fridge is full, and fills a balikbayan box-sized Tupperware with our favorite snacks: Cheetos, Dewberry, Oreo, Graham Crackers, Growers peanuts, Pancit Canton and some Korean noodle snacks.

Unlike most of her mom-friends who sport A-line dresses and matching tops and bottoms paired with mid-height mommy-heels, her daily attire consists of a house dress (commonly known as "duster") with some crocheted details and tsinelas. When she walks, her feet make a certain brushing sound that signals she's coming. She also has a habit of opening doors quickly, making you jump off your seat.

As caring as any other mother, Mama Rose exudes love. Our family members are fond of spending time alone. After dinner, we all go to our separate rooms. I go upstairs and usually watch downloaded movies or TV shows before I teach Japanese people how to speak in English. My older sister goes to her room, lies down and watches Etc on TV. My dad goes to the master's bedroom with my 4 -year-old niece and they watch cartoons together until she falls asleep; when she does, my dad plays Fruit Ninja on his iPad.

Once everything is in order in the living room and kitchen, Mama Rose then grabs a Paulo Cuelho or an Amy Tan book, lies down on the couch and reads until she falls asleep. Sooner or later, she wakes up to check on each of us. She pops her head through my door and asks how my hamster is doing, walks in and sits on the floor beside his little playground-mansion. "Hammy, hammyyyy, oh hammy.. there you are! You're so cute, hammy!" she would coo in a very cute baby-voice.

When we all fall asleep, she turns off all the gadgets we have been using in our "alone-time" and kisses us all good night. I know this, because I pretend to be asleep most of the time, just to check for any unwanted acts! But none, she graciously respects our privacy. As she sneaks out of my room, at times she leaves messages using a whiteboard marker on the mirror. "I love you, anak."

This, too, is the same when I come home from school. "I miss you, Ka!"

During the day, when my dad and sister are at work, my niece in school and in tutorial lessons, and I, at school or in the gym, Mama Rose spends most of her time in her office beside our house. Her office, a light blue, almost white, square shaped studio where not only the supplies, but our craft materials can fit. The space is not as big as it sounds; she just manages to fit everything very neatly.

She makes tons of phones calls every day, to suppliers in Manila and her customers: hotels and gasoline stations. She plans everything -- each family member's, schedule, including my grandpa's (doctor's) appointments, and dates with his friends. All these are jotted down on her planner which she buys before the end of every year.

Even after 50 years, she still continues to serve her father. He comes to Cebu and stays at our house every two months. It has never been easy for her. For someone old and mature, he is quite a handful. When he's around, Mama has to be there to drive him around, trim his hair, remind him to take his medicine and blood pressure, and when he gets insanely angry for small reasons, she has to fix it to make him feel all right, and apologize to the helpers whom my grandpa screams at when he doesn't get what he wants.

When we are out late with our friends and come home past dawn, she is always there to meet us at the doorstep and greet us with a very pleasant smile. She asks us to take a shower.

My mom is like Superwoman. When you call on her when you're in trouble, she sure will help you. Like when she visits her sister at work, all the way in Banilad, just to talk with her about family problems or business matters. She immediately drives all the way there with no make-up on, jeans and her infamous stripe shirts and some diamonds on her ears, smelling fresh and yet with no perfume. She comes back to the house to bring my niece to Beverly Hills for her Chinese tutorials at 3 in the afternoon. She'll jog, or do the errands or the grocery for two hours until she picks my niece up again at 5. There are five people she patiently serves with love.

When I come home early from school, I see her in the kitchen preparing a scrumptious meal of Hickory baby back ribs and mashed potatoes. When we have guests, she sees to it that the dinner table is full of even more delicious Filipino meals, like pochero or sinigang, lechon kawali, pork belly and Sago't Gulaman for dessert. Though we have a helper to cook for us, she does the cooking especially if her arthritis doesn't kick in, just to please our taste buds. "We always gain weight when we eat here!" my cousins would complain, while taking another bite of the dinner prepared.

The Bible says "Older women likewise are to be reverent in behavior, not slanderers or slaves to much wine. They are to teach what is good, and so train the young women to love their husbands and children, to be self-controlled, pure, working at home, kind, and submissive to their own husbands, that the word of God may not be reviled." This is exactly how my mother is, a beautiful woman inside and out; and a true wife in the eyes of God.

All women, mothers or not, should strive to be beautiful, not by being the fairest of them all, but by being the woman God wants us to be inside.