The tale of two recovering addicts

CEBU, Philippines - “I am a grateful recovering addict,” this is how center director Vicente “Tico” Aldanese introduces himself to his patients at the We Do Recover Center for Creative Living Solutions (www.wedorecover.net). And he revealed to The FREEMAN that he is not ashamed of this fact – of his past.

“I started using drugs at the age of 10, and I stopped at 40,” he said.

“I tried every single drug possible. I always wanted to catch that first high. I have been in rehab three times. Once, I worked in a rehab (center) for one year, but even inside I was using it,” he continued.

But as with every addict, Tico reached his lowest point.

“Eventually no one would hire me. Wala na ko’y kwarta. Ang akong mga amigo maglikay-likay na nako kay kabalo sila na ako ra silang ig-on ug kwarta (I no longer had any money. My friends would avoid me because they knew that I would only ask money from them). I was bankrupt emotionally, intellectually, financially and physically,” he confessed.

“I was already tired and so I asked a friend to help me. I started with a one-year program, and it was then that I realized that if you just do what your counselor would tell you to do, there is a chance to recover,” he said.

Getting into rehab

Tico admitted that almost often addicts are forced to go into rehab, whether through threat of a court order, as with his case, or forcefully taken to the facility. But, he added that if the patient would realize the need to recover, the need to control his craving, then treatment can be successful.

“If they believe that they can change then they will change,” he said.

“There are some rehabs where they would literally bring the patient to their lowest,” Tico revealed. “The patients are verbally abused and are treated with no respect. Sometimes this would work because the patient would eventually realize how destroyed his life is. But I believe that addiction is a sickness, and so I treat my patients as if they are sick: with care and through an educational system.”

He explained that We Do Recover is run like a boarding school. “We have a structure that the patients would follow. By 6 a.m. they would wake up, then they would do calisthenics and breakfast. By 9 a.m. they would have their first meeting, which is a self-help support group. Then at 10 a.m. the journal group would meet,” he said.

The journal group meeting, Tico explained, is where the patients would read the reflections that they wrote the night before. The other patients would then give a feedback on the entry.

Tico, however, admits that there is no one sure way of treating addiction saying that for some, a harsh treatment may be effective, while for others, to be treated humanely is the most effective method.

But Tico is certain of one thing, and that is that We Do Recover “is a place where everybody will be treated as human beings.”

BJ’s story

BJ Eusebio, the center’s psychologist and counselor, was also an addict, and a decade ago, he realized his need to change.

“I started at the age of 14, and for four years I was using shabu and marijuana,” he revealed.

Even though he gets to experience both visual and auditory hallucinations, BJ said that this did not thwart him from using prohibited substances. “They just disappear when the effects of the drug disappears,” he said.

But one time, BJ related that he started talking to a mango tree believing it to be a sentient being. “It was then that I realized that something needs to be done. I prayed that this nightmare would end,” he said. And it was then that he decided to enroll in We Do Recover.

“After recovery, it was a struggle. Every day, I have to remind myself that I am an addict, otherwise I’d go back using again,” he said.

BJ then went to take up and finish his studies in Psychology because as he said, “I want to carry my message to other addicts who are suffering. I want to stress that there will always be hope after Ondoy (referring to the latest typhoon that hit the country).”

Changing the family and the community’s perception

One of the challenges of rehabilitation, according to Tico, is the community’s perception on addicts.

“We want to change the perception of society on addicts,” he said. “We want the community to be involved because they too will be affected by this problem.”

“It’s a vicious cycle,” said Tico, adding that at times, the family’s concern and attention given to the addict would contribute in the cycle, explaining that when a family member gets mad at the addict, this triggers a sense of depression and lowers the self esteem of the addict. In order to lift himself up, he would then take prohibited substances.

“The family must learn how to take care of themselves and not concentrate on the addict,” he advised.

One time, Tico said, he went home unable to get inside their house because his mother changed all the locks when she realized that her son was again back to his old habit. “She just looked out the window and told me that I knew where to go,” he said. He stayed overnight in their garage only to be stirred awake by their community’s security guard who told him that his mother informed them that he knew where to go.

Tico then decided to go to rehab that day.

Family sessions

He said that the family of a drug addict also needs to undergo special sessions. “We have a one-on-one session with the family, and they also have a multi-family session,” he revealed.

“The multi-family session allows for each family to realize that they are not alone. That there are also other families who are experiencing the same experience that they are enduring. Each can relate all their experiences together,” he said.

Surrender to win

Tico admitted that although drug addiction is a sickness, there is no cure to it. However, he said that if the patient is determined to change then he would be able to get the strength to fight the urge to use drugs again.

“I thought that I was powerful over everything. I needed to realize that I am powerless over other things. The only thing that I can change is my reaction to drugs, people, things and others,” said Tico, adding that this simple philosophy of surrendering to defeat has helped him to change his mind set on his situation. This same philosophy is what they use to bring their patients to realize their mistakes and change their mind set.

“Our first goal is to try to help the patient realize that they have messed up their life. Then when they have realized this, they would want to start to be happy,” he said.

“It’s not only taking out the drugs, but also of (adapting) new ways of living, new behavioral patterns,” he concluded.

Aside from drug addiction, We Do Recover also caters to alcohol abuse, compulsive gambling, co-dependency or relationship problems, and anger management.

We Do Recover is located at 3rd St., La Guardia, Lahug, Cebu City. For information contact (032)2315229 or 2389143.