Freeman Cebu Entertainment

Stories from outside

April 20, 2010 | 12:00am

“Know something, sugar? Stories only happen to people who can tell them,” said Allan Gurganus. That’s a quote that leaped out of Twitter as I was seeking inspiration for this piece.

My schedule’s been a wreck lately, as I’m back working with an organization close to my heart, the Organizational Change Consultants International Center for Learning, Inc., where I first began to experience my greatness through a series of seminars I’d recommend you—yes you, who’s reading this—take. Contact me if you’re interested. There are seminars outside of Manila, where I am currently based.

Due to my busyness, I haven’t had much time to watch TV and films—which is not as bad as I had thought it would be, because I’ve been enjoying life outside. Or, as my friends joke, “Sa labas (ng Bahay ni Kuya.)”Of course, there’s a lot to be said of what’s happening outside as well.

There’s the taxi drivers I encounter. After a scary incident involving a cab almost two years ago, I haven’t been really comfortable with just any cab, so I tend to be choosy with ones I take. Call me brand-conscious when it comes to commuting. Lately, though, I seem to be getting really interesting personalities as cabbies.

Interesting Commutes

One guy had the grooviest cab I have ever taken. It was bright orange and white on the outside, with a huge neon ad for something, perhaps fabric freshener, instead of a taxi light. Inside, the roof was dotted with stickers—of Jesus, cats, flowers, anime girls in short skirts—and glow-in-the-dark stars. On the rear-view mirror, a big red Chinese good luck décor was hanging, dangling in front of a statue of the Holy Family that stood beside a little statue of a spotty open-mouthed giraffe head that was presently home to a plastic black ballpoint pen. The driver himself looked groovy too: he wore aviator shades and a brown flowery silk shirt. He was blinged out in Saudi gold. He also tried to chat me up and offer to pick me up after work.

Another cab driver, perhaps my favorite character so far, had the tidiest cab ever. It helped that the car was a new model too. His shirt was almost sparkling white and from where I sat, I could see he was wearing shiny leather shoes. Imagine a friend’s dad who listens to Sinatra. That’s how he looked. And, speaking of Sinatra, he had music on—a CD of himself, singing to Old Blue Eyes’ hits!

Sometimes, you notice tiny details in your commute. While waiting for a bus one evening, I noticed that the paint was chipping off the green fences that fail miserably to keep pedestrians from jaywalking. Underneath the green paint: Bayani Fernando’s pink.

Interesting Exchanges At Work

I have bigger responsibilities now at work, but I still teach my French, Italian and Spanish students one hour a day. And it’s still always fun. And funny. Here are the latest hilarious exchanges from my compilation.

“What do women get every month?”

Last week.

Me: “I’m not feeling so well.”

Female learner: “Why?”

Me: “I’m having a difficult time with... you know, the monthly problem of women.”

Learner: “I don’t understand.”

Me: “What do all women get every month?”

Learner, oh-so-matter-of-factly: “A paycheck.”

This week.

Same learner: “I’m not firing on all four cylinders.”

Me, impressed: “Wow, where did you get that expression?”

Learner: “My (British) bf described me this way when I told him about our lesson last week.”