Understanding our relationship with money

Money, making it as well as losing it is closely tied to our behavior or perhaps our own psychology of money. A healthy relationship with money is having conscious and purposeful relationship with money that isn’t overly stressful. Unfortunately, so many people don’t even realize that they have any relationship with money.

People instantly think that the word relationship has everything to do with people, but we have relationships with everything.

Relationship — it is the way in which, two or more concepts, objects, or people are connected, or the state of being connected.

It’s not our fault

Everyone has a complex relationship when it comes to money; some healthy, others unhealthy for you may have been taught to think about money a certain way since you were a child or perhaps our environment and culture may contribute to this. Some people have had some bad experiences around money at some point, and carry around this bad feeling their whole lives.

For example, if you value religion, you might do tithing. Or, if you value education, you may prioritize college savings.If you grew up in an entrepreneurial household, you may have higher risk tolerance or perhaps more frugal than others.

Know yourself

This is easier said than done, but knowing is only half the battle. If knowledge is power, then what is more powerful than knowledge? It is habits. Once you pin-point these (both good and bad), you must seek to change it as soon as possible.

Your relationship with your money is very individual, emotional and personal.  Only you will reap the benefits or problems that will result from your efforts or lack thereof.

What are the ways to improve your relationship to money?

* Practice mindfulness - If you believe you will never have enough money, you will never have enough money. What you focus on the most will likely be the outcome of your actions. Also, if you are itching to buy something, pause or let a day pass before deciding.

* Stop looking at money as an obstacle - Instead of "I wish I had enough money to do that", feeling as if money is holding you back from doing the things that are important, you can start by asking "How can I make my money work for me?"

* Prioritize and make goals — In order to make your relationship with money a priority, you must have something that you are working towards by creating an action plan.

* Adjust your goals — Take a good look at your budget. One way to help yourself change your spending habits is to establish incentives that will motivate you to meet your goals.

* Do not shame yourself — If you set goals and do not meet them, if you make a financial mistake, or if you violate a personal financial boundary or value, do not shame yourself for it.Change can be painful—but from change comes growth.

Get some Help

In order to change your financial world, you need to change your feelings and paradigm about money. Also sometimes we cannot go at it alone, don’t hesitate to seek out the help of expertsas well (that’s not a salesperson!).

What are some ways you are improving your relationship with money?

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The writer is an RFP® - registered financial planner of RFP PH, Licensed Real Estate Broker and Director of CERTA, Inc., a family estate planning and investment advisory firm. To know more about financial planning and training services, please visit www.certa.ph