Horror terror in America

A Spanish-Filipino with Moorish features arriving at the San Francisco International Airport was recently detained on secondary inspection for more than five hours by the US Homeland Security. The reason: He had a wrapped package in his luggage containing a cell phone with a battery juice charger. This poor Filipino passenger had the misfortune of arriving in the United States at the height of paranoia just when authorities discovered a terrorist plot by al-Qaeda using FedEx packages ostensibly timed for All Souls Day, Thanksgiving or the midterm elections in the US. Apparently, authorities were tipped off that a passenger arriving in San Francisco could potentially be a terrorist carrying a small package.

US Homeland Security people are on full alert, and one can’t really blame the US authorities for being paranoid considering that the terror threat against the US continues unabated. Americans are horrified to realize that such mundane things as sending packages have now become security threats. The Filipino mestizo after three hours asked to call his lawyer-friend and demanded for his rights. The agent calmly told him, “I’m sorry sir, you have no rights. We can detain you here for as long as we want.” Perhaps the profile for the terrorist, according to a former US intelligence official, is somebody with Moorish Spanish features. He told us that he remembers the time when the al-Qaeda carried out a spectacular bombing in Madrid days before the March 2004 elections in Spain which killed 200 people. The recently discovered terror plot has been described by US officials as “having the hallmarks of al-Qaeda.” After being released close to midnight, the Spanish-Filipino could only exclaim in frustration, “Que horror!”

Horror stories

Speaking of horror stories, the gated communities in Makati have become the favorite playground for most spirits and ghosts. There have been a number of ghost stories circulating in the area with private security guards claiming to see several ladies in white moving around the villages. A local parish priest who is a known exorcist confirmed that there are indeed many of these spirits who need to be prayed over and houses that need to be exorcised. In South Forbes, a house has long been empty reportedly because a lot of people who have died in it continue to inhabit the place, making it very difficult for real estate brokers to sell the property. The only consolation to horror stories is that ghosts don’t usually kill you, but real people in terror stories can.

Footing the bill

The much-anticipated November 10 speaking engagement of former US President Bill Clinton at the Manila Hotel is expected to be a sell out. The Philippine STAR is one of the major sponsors. It can be recalled that during Clinton’s first visit to Manila in 1994, he was also billeted at the MacArthur Suite of the Manila Hotel. But several days before his arrival, the US Secret Service discovered that the king size bed where the six-feet, two-inches tall president would be sleeping in was short by a foot. The then-Manila Hotel general manager, Señor Don Miguel Cerqueda, had to promptly improvise and get a longer bed that could comfortably accommodate the tall US President. According to our sources, no need for anyone to foot the bill to accommodate Bill’s foot this time, since the MacArthur suite king size bed has not been replaced since Bill’s last visit. 

Quick fixes

Its typical among Filipinos to think of quick fix solutions to worm their way out of a problem rather than own up to it, which is exactly what happened with the West Tower Condominium gas leak. It took several months for the First Philippine Industrial Corp. to finally admit it is the source of the leak after initially denying it. In most other countries, the authorities immediately step in and hold business entities responsible when a problem breaks out, knowing it is the right and practical thing to do and could actually save them from expensive litigation in the long run. As things stand, the leak – which was discovered by the team of experts from UP NIGS (National Institute of Geological Sciences) in less than two weeks – has already turned into a major legal issue that can become more costly in the end. Reportedly, an American mercenary lawyer has quietly arrived in the country to offer his services for a fee to the West Tower residents and take the case to an international court for litigation.

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