Disgusting airport

One of our Eye-spies, who left for abroad the other day, reported to us the state of disrepair of the NAIA 1 facilities. He noted that the toilets don’t flush, that the airconditioning system is defective, and that leaks and water stains appear on rainy days. It is bad enough that people see the NAIA 3 just standing there, an inutile monument to Philippine corruption. Manila International Airport Authority Manager Ed Manda should do something or, otherwise, he should ship himself out of the airport. An airport is crucial to attracting tourists and investments. The first and last thing that a foreigner will see in the country is the airport. It is the welcome mat and the goodbye wave combined. If an airport doesn’t instill confidence, which ours doesn’t, that impression will last for the rest of a visitor’s stay. No doubt, we’ll be amazed at how much revenues the country has lost due to the bad first impression set by the airport. The President should consider commissioning the NAIA3, which, by the way, is already decaying. A consciousness of tourism is not the private reserve of the Department of Tourism. Everyone – from waiters, infrastructure planners and builders, to airport managers –must take the personal responsibility to provide for the comfort and security of visitors and domestic travelers. All it takes is common sense, which isn’t so common, to realize this.

Tocino Over Canadian Bacon

If Sen. Nene Pimentel’s assertion that Guillermo "Bill" Luz is Canadian bacon is true, then the burden of proof in convincing the public that he is a Filipino falls on Bill’s shoulders. Certainly, holding Alien Certificate Registration No. B 289495 and Immigration Certificate of Residence No. 212760 doesn’t strengthen his case. And showing a Philippine passport proves nothing because everybody knows that it is so easy to get one. If anybody should shut up, it should be Bill Luz. As a non-Filipino, he should not be meddling in the Philippine electoral process. If there is anything that Filipinos hate it is having foreigners tell them what to do. Rep. Digs Dilangalen may be annoying but at least he is a Filipino. And another Filipino can tell him to shut up but a foreigner should never even attempt to do so. We prefer tocino over Canadian bacon anytime. But in this case where Digs’ sensibilities should be considered, beef tapa will do. That being settled, let’s all just shut up and eat.

Bicol Express

A family in one of Bicol’s towns is on the look-out for anybody who can forge documents and help them get out of the country fast. Apparently, this family is trying to tap its military contacts to help them. They’re on the run because they have been very naughty. They ran away with the lump sum retirement money invested by gullible retired government employees in their lending corporation. Naturally, the duped retirees were not amused so they filed criminal charges for qualified theft. The name of the lending corporation is a combination of the wife’s maiden name and the husband’s last name. The family has become very desperate since a warrant of arrest was issued to the matriarch a few months ago. Let’s hope that the Bicol Express they hop aboard on leads straight to the slammer.

MMDA Won’t Touch VD

Who is this Presidential assistant who has been making full use of his position to violate the No Plate, No Travel policy? While the MMDA has strictly imposed penalties for offenders, this Palace functionary has been flagrantly flouting that he can’t be touched. Hint: Could he be untouchable by the MMDA because he has the initials of a sexually-transmitted disease that Dr. Garma is known to cure?

From The Listening Post: A Report From Cavendish

The Man from Cavendish, the codename of one of our diplomatic corps Ear-spies, reported that we could be getting on travel advisory lists again if our overheated political temperature doesn’t simmer down. Cavendish said that the Americans believe "it will come down to scope of the plotting and execution thereof. If it were on the scale of an Edsa, it would cause major repercussions and concern." For the past week, the foreign intelligence community has been trying to find answers to these two questions. Is there enough opposition support to create a constitutional crisis?; and with all these loyalty checks in the camps, are these coup rumors viable? Cavendish heard that the opposition is allegedly broke and cannot fund massive street protests by the end of June. Cavendish was seen leisurely pondering over the answer to these two while smoking a pipeful of Amphora tobacco on a yacht trip with friends last weekend.

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